Why is it so hard to take a few hours just for myself? I actually feel guilty when I go for a coffee and linger for a little while. Or get my hair cut and buy a book just to read for sheer pleasure. Well today I said EFF it, I'm going to take some time just for me with no end result. Dropped the girls off, found a little salon that took me right away. Got my hair finally cut, so I don't have to cringe every morning looking in the mirror at the institutional hair cut I gave myself. And maybe I won't ware a hat every day, now maybe every other day. Then took off to the plaza, got a large tea, and used my gift certificate I got for my birthday and bought myself a new book. Though it is a sewing book, it had too many cute patterns to pass up, and it looks fun! I did feel a little guilty texting Johnny I wasn't going to be home for a bit, but shook it off and enjoyed a wonderful morning. This was a turning point for myself, deciding take some time just for me, I really do deserve it. Now that the twins are older, Miyoko goes to a pre-K program 3 hours daily, Sakura and Katana are in school all day. The big change is, Johnny is now home till 2pm regularly, so I can take off and be an adult for a little bit. The rest of my day is so slam packed, not a lot of time to even think, it's was really nice to just chill and not worry if I have to pick someone up or drop them off. Most days I really think I'm on auto pilot and wonder what the hell have I done all day? I was so happy, then got a little depressed, thinking this would be great to meet up with Amy a few times a month and hang out, even if it's just thirty minutes. Then remembered we live 2200 miles apart now. I do have a few friends here in town, but miss my long time partner in crime. Why is it so hard to make adult women friends I don't want to strangle or barf on because they are way too full of themselves? So a late, but well needed resolution for 2012, take time off and take better care of myself. Sounds simple enough but will be a struggle, but I am always up for a challenge. Maybe next week I'll meet up with a friend for coffee and pretend we're so wealthy this is the only thing we have to do daily. Hahaha I don't think I could that for long, and sounds a bit childish. But I have never admitted to acting like an adult much. I'll end with the best line my nephew said to me, "You're an adult? You can't be you're too short to be one!" Love that kid!
The girls
Thursday, January 19, 2012
A mothers guilt
Why is it so hard to take a few hours just for myself? I actually feel guilty when I go for a coffee and linger for a little while. Or get my hair cut and buy a book just to read for sheer pleasure. Well today I said EFF it, I'm going to take some time just for me with no end result. Dropped the girls off, found a little salon that took me right away. Got my hair finally cut, so I don't have to cringe every morning looking in the mirror at the institutional hair cut I gave myself. And maybe I won't ware a hat every day, now maybe every other day. Then took off to the plaza, got a large tea, and used my gift certificate I got for my birthday and bought myself a new book. Though it is a sewing book, it had too many cute patterns to pass up, and it looks fun! I did feel a little guilty texting Johnny I wasn't going to be home for a bit, but shook it off and enjoyed a wonderful morning. This was a turning point for myself, deciding take some time just for me, I really do deserve it. Now that the twins are older, Miyoko goes to a pre-K program 3 hours daily, Sakura and Katana are in school all day. The big change is, Johnny is now home till 2pm regularly, so I can take off and be an adult for a little bit. The rest of my day is so slam packed, not a lot of time to even think, it's was really nice to just chill and not worry if I have to pick someone up or drop them off. Most days I really think I'm on auto pilot and wonder what the hell have I done all day? I was so happy, then got a little depressed, thinking this would be great to meet up with Amy a few times a month and hang out, even if it's just thirty minutes. Then remembered we live 2200 miles apart now. I do have a few friends here in town, but miss my long time partner in crime. Why is it so hard to make adult women friends I don't want to strangle or barf on because they are way too full of themselves? So a late, but well needed resolution for 2012, take time off and take better care of myself. Sounds simple enough but will be a struggle, but I am always up for a challenge. Maybe next week I'll meet up with a friend for coffee and pretend we're so wealthy this is the only thing we have to do daily. Hahaha I don't think I could that for long, and sounds a bit childish. But I have never admitted to acting like an adult much. I'll end with the best line my nephew said to me, "You're an adult? You can't be you're too short to be one!" Love that kid!
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